Social events can bring unexpected difficulties for those with ASD, below we explore challenges with autism and opening presents.

Birthdays and other festivities are a great time to bond with friends and family.

Whilst for the majority they are times for fun and excitement, for some with autism they can be sources for anxiety.

You may have noticed that a seemingly simple act of opening presents can sometimes be a challenging and overwhelming experience.

Let’s explore why this may be the case;

Opening presents

There are certain rituals which are repeated in all corners of the world.

One of which is celebrating someone’s birthday with gifts. If you break down the process however there are certain stages which could be difficult for those with autism.

Social pressures

Gift-giving is a social activity, and autistic people may feel pressured to react in ways that are expected by society.

This social aspect of gift-giving, such as saying thank you and showing excitement, can be difficult for them.

Autistic children and adults may have trouble expressing their emotions or may not react in the same way neurotypical children do.

Their anxiety may build as the time nears to react to each gift which can take the shine off the enjoyment.

It is also the fact that generally speaking all eyes are on them.

Some people with autism don’t like to be the centre of attention and this is a situation when that is usually the case.

Sensory overload

One of the primary reasons autistic children may struggle with opening presents is due to their heightened sensory sensitivities.

Autistic individuals often have an acute sensitivity to sensory input, such as lights, sounds, and textures.

Wrapping paper crinkling, the bright colours of gift wrap, and the sound of tearing paper can be overwhelming for them.

You also have the accompanying “happy birthday” song which is delivered at various points.

This can be distressing in itself.

Sometimes it is helpful to put yourself in an autistic individuals shoes;

Imagine the feeling of being in a room with singing, flashing lights, and an uncomfortable texture against your skin, all at once.

Now, multiply that sensation several times over.

This is what it can be like for autistic people when they open presents.

This can wind up making the experience distressing rather than joyful.

Break to routine

Autistic children often thrive on routine and predictability.

The act of opening presents or celebrating can disrupt their established routines and create anxiety.

They may even prefer the predictability of knowing what’s inside the gift rather than the element of surprise.

Unexpected changes can be unsettling, and opening presents is a break from their usual routine.

Again if we place ourselves in their shoes the logic adds up.

If you found comfort in the same routine every morning but then once a year it all changed, this could obviously be distressing.

How to make the process more comfortable

Now we have a good idea as to why opening presents can be distressing, let’s consider what we can do.

Prepare them in advance

It is common for those with autism to like to know what to expect.

With that being the case let your child know that there will be gifts, and describe the process of opening them.

Using something like a schedule board can help here.

This can help reduce anxiety by providing a sense of predictability.

Protect their senses

You can try to create a sensory-friendly space for gift opening.

Dim the lights, minimise noise, and provide sensory tools or objects to help your child cope with sensory overload.

You could even have gifts in bags as opposed to wrapping paper if you think this would be more appealing.

Consider role playing

You could practice the process in advance opening perhaps familiar objects, gradually introducing the concept of surprise.

This can help your child become more comfortable with the process.

You could pretend it is a teddies birthday as a way to warm up your child to the process.

Don’t force reactions

Allow your child to express their excitement or gratitude in their own way.

It might not look like the typical reaction, but it’s valid and genuine for them.

One of the most damaging things you could do is try and force a specific reaction, such as directing hugs.

Your child may become extremely distressed and associate that distress with presents.

Respect their limits

Along the same vein as not forcing reactions, it is important to respect their limits.

If your child is too overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a break or even skip gift opening altogether.

Their well-being is more important than adhering to social norms.

Autism and opening presents

It’s important to remember that every autistic person is unique, and their comfort levels with present opening will vary.

By understanding their sensory sensitivities and the pressure to conform, you can make gift-giving a more enjoyable and stress-free experience for your child.

It is important to remember, keeping them calm and comfortable is often the best gift you can give them.